Motherhood should be taught at schools


We have all had that moment. when the winner of the award is called upon stage and she thanks her mother, reminding us that motherhood is the most important job in the world. The moment is often accompanied by tears of joy and other things which should not be in open display for public consumption. Granted! I have had a few kleenex moments of my own. And I will be the first to vote in favour of any assertion that cites motherhood as the most important job around, but why aren’t we regulating this business?

If social grant statistics are anything to go by the motherhood industry is one of the fastest growing over the last decade. people are seriously taking up god on his suggestion to populate the world and to marry of course.

In many Muslim communities parenting skills are passed on from a very early age

As often as it is said that children are the future perhaps it wouldn’t be such a bad idea to have formal training for the people who are responsible for that future. Motherhood should be an academic course taught at schools. I know the feminists are going to have my head for this one, so before the guards take me to the gallows let me go for the jugular.

The very idea that motherhood is an instinctive affair is not only utopian it is fast disapproving its own validity. I have a problem trusting a gender that at times have been known to dump babies in trash bags, and abort them at the ages of twelve.

Now of course these things always happen because of other social pressures, chief of which is the lacking of available male support.

Studies have suggested that up to 40% of South African children grow up without fathers. Surely as useful as a social grant would be (I use the term loosely because by modern standards R300 is anything but useful) we need a stronger support system for young and first time mothers.

We live in a society where cultural convention trumps social responsibility and very often young single mothers are ostracised because they are viewed as spoilt goods. The underlying objective of having motherhood as an academic course available at our schools would be to create a conducive support structure for women who are going through this, so they can engage in dialogue with each other.

But more over it will provide an opportunity to take away the stigma that comes with early single parenting. As young people with or without children start speaking openly about  these issues it creates a greater sense of community.

For women without an adequate support system, even skills like breat feeding are hard

There are many who would in turn argue that the implementation of such a thing would advocate for a more patriarchal society then the one we already have, to them I would say maybe in this instance patriarchy isn’t such a bad word. In many middle eastern countries where initiatives like this are common place studies have shown that family dynamics and social support far exceed that which is available in developed countries.

Learning motherhood does not mean that it takes away a mother’s right to decide on their child’s future, but it would be a great start towards making sure that mothers know the options that are available to them. Be it from little things like how to help you kids in school to even more important ones like when to vaccinate and for what. We can longer afford to sweep under the carpet the many social problems that arise from bad parenting. We need to reverse the trend and start actively taking action is raising our future. As the cliché goes, it takes a village to raise a child.

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Comments
6 Responses to “Motherhood should be taught at schools”
  1. ShakyKnee says:

    Ah, I see that I was much too hasty in my judgement. My apologies.

    But in my defense, there wasn’t a proper back story for that example -TIP- so I cannot be fully blamed for drawing an incorrect conclusion.

    Good job, though.

  2. ShakyKnee says:

    I agree with Sandile. What about having a course in fatherhood?

    Or better yet, instead of just having girls in the motherhood course, let the boys take it as well!

    ‘Coz let’s face it, there ain’t no Immaculate Conception

    and it’s about time boys and men acknowledge that raising a kid is not easy. Maybe then they might think twice about just ‘fucking and chucking’.

    It’s all too easy to diss young mothers and to condemn the abandonment of babies and to advocate an even more patriarchal society.

    All this post said to me was that you condone the actions of absent/negligent fathers and that it is taken for granted that girls will be abandoned when they fall pregnant.

    Taking your example of the 12-year-old aborting the foetus, I doubt a boy of a similar age could have made her pregnant so it could only have been someone older and who should have known better!

    So really, your chauvinistic mind is not equipped to give good advice to young woman.

    • SihleMthembu says:

      i fullty agree boys must be trained as well-the reason why i placed emphasis on women was because I felt that women unfortunately are the ones who deal with the challanges head on. so perhaps they should be given higher priority.
      in fact i was reading a recent study about how single well trained an educated women are more likely ro raise a better and more succesful child on their own then if they did so with a partner. this is a clear indication that education is important. you make a good poitn about how boys should not fuck and chuck. yes it is true men shoudl take a lot of the blame and they should be educated about taking responsibility. but as i had indicated earlier if both pregnant single mothers and those not pregnat and without children came together int he same space it would be a great learnign curve for both groups and young women will be empowered with education and they will be able to make clever choices from an informed standpoint and they will not allow themselves to be “fucked and chucked” as you put it. those that are already in the situation will have a strong peer support system allowing them to not make the same mistake twice. i do not condone neglegent father at all. i myself was raised by a single mother, and through organisations like brothers for life, i have worked a lot with young boys about teaching them taking responsibilty for their action. i have also written extensivley on the subject. i am not at all dissing women who have to take abortions like i said they have to do those things because they are forced too. and i firmly bealive that if they have a supprt system like this they will not feel alone and make decisions that they will regret for the rest of their lives. in terms of bing a chauvanist i am really sorry you feel that way. but the 12 9year old girls that i spend time with on weekends at a shelter im sure will tell you different. if my chauvinism means i am getting up and taking my time to do something then by all means i am chauvanistic-excuse my spelling I am really tired.–but thanks for the comment. its good to know we have engagement on these issues

  3. sandile gumede says:

    nice one raz. but what about fatherhood. because fathers seemed to be running away from their responsibilities?

    • SihleMthembu says:

      of course mfana–but I think women need to be given first priority because unfortunately they are the one’s who have to deal directly with these issue. and as the old saying goes teaching a girl is teaching a nation

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